Ephesians 4:30-32 Our Manners–Kindness and Forgiveness
“And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave you” (ESV).
This is part five of a five-part series about the Christian lifestyle inspired by Dr. Davd Jeremiah’s book, Belief That Behaves. This part is entitled, Our Manners—Kindness and Forgiveness.
Sounds like a big job to put away all those negative things: bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, and malice. We are not just to put them away, we are to replace them with good characteristics or actions: kindness, tenderheartedness, and forgiveness. I find it interesting that six nasty things can be replaced by three good things and then life will be incredibly better. Maybe that demonstrates that the traits we get from God are twice as powerful as those we get from satan. I know that my Savior, Jesus, defeated satan and humiliated him in front of his followers, so certainly his gifts are more powerful than the traits we get from satan.
Unfortunately those negative traits are often used against the ones we love the most, our family members. “Oh, he or she will understand.” Maybe he or she won’t understand and relationships can be broken or at least damaged for a time. Sometimes we think we need to use good manners with strangers but not with those we love. The word “love” implies that we will treat those we love with special care just because we love them, and that includes good manners.
Dr Jeremiah states in His book, Belief That Behaves, “Verse 32 (of Ephesians, chapter four) modifies the Golden Rule. It doesn’t say ‘Treat others as you would like them to treat you.’ It says, ‘Treat others as God has treated you.’” That’s a significant difference. The last part of that quote could be paraphrased as, “Forgive others as God has forgiven you.” God has not only forgiven our sins, He has forgotten them. He holds no grudges, and He expects us to do the same. If we are to live a Christian lifestyle, we need to forgive and to hold no grudges. That sounds like grace to me.
We all think of helping an older person across the street as kindness, but there are myriad ways we can show kindness every day. To do so, we need to do as the Lord ask us to do, think of others needs before our own. Often kindness given will result in kindness received, and at least in our immediate neighborhood, life will be more peaceful and enjoyable. It is not always easy to be forgiving, kind, and tenderhearted. Some people we encounter will be confrontive, rude, or even mean and hateful. That’s when we need to depend upon the help of the Holy Spirit to help us to respond to their attacks with kindness and forgiveness. This is when Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:39 come into play: “But I say to you. Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.” Jesus didn’t say it was easy; He just said that that is what we should do.
Thanks for reading this five-part series on the Christian lifetstyle. Please return tomorrow for a conclusion to this series.